The empath, the narcissist & trauma bonding...

Let's talk about an unpopular opinion on a popular topic... empath, narcissist and trauma bonding...

This popular topic has been requested for me to tackle and here is what I channeled for the beautiful souls in my Telegram group...

To me, it goes a bit beyond, or deeper than being an empath

1) yes being an empath does play a role

2) but it's also the need for safety (often caused by trauma or by heavy conditional love from family)

3) the need for approval/validation

4) having so much love to give !!! (and this is beautiful in itself!)

Narcissists want that, they want to be admired and they're ready to give you everything you want (in appearance, at least) so they can be loved, and it's a kind of "trauma bonding" indirectly.

It's nobody's fault, sometimes the narcissist doesn't even know he is a narcissist because you have the covert narcissist as well, who will literally constantly bullshit himself without realizing he/she is even doing that.

Sometimes the narcissist is aware and that makes it worse (or actually easier because then you don't even feel sorry for them if they're aware, it then becomes a choice)

But the narcissists who aren't aware are the trickiest because they push buttons and guilt-trip, then it's not them that you have to face (because they'll BS you and gaslight you anyway, right?)... The one you have to face is yourself, choosing yourself and coming to a point where you don't give a f anymore, you just choose yourself.

And that can be hard when you're not supported and you are scared to validate yourself.

As I always say: can you be there for yourself as much as you have been there for the narcissist or you have been there for others? Let me tell you, my dear, there is nothing selfish, nothing to be guilt-tripped about... Choose yourself, it's always worth it.

Never shame yourself, judge yourself or think bad about yourself for having been in that relationship.

You have so much love to give, your heart is pure and you deserve to give it to a human who will not only appreciate but reciprocate it. It's time for balance! :)

If you're aware you've been attracting narcissists, chances are you've already started healing this pattern as awareness is always the 1st step...

If you're totally done with that pattern, let's work together on healing your deepest trauma and your wounds of abandonment and rejection so that you can reach the next level of relationships (with yourself and others!)

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